What is this all about? Maybe you should read the READ ME READ ME.
august 24, 1996: Commune Ick A Shun, Part II
Many people responded to the question I posed yesterday, wherein I stated:
Why even bother?
and here are some of the things you said:
Date: Fri, 23 Aug 1996 11:15:29 -0700
Subject: C O M M U N I C A T I O N is impossible.
Then why am I bothering to send this? What is the point? Am I just ranting on my own into a vaccuum? Do I make comments just to see my thoughts in text? Is this a fruitless endeavour?
I don't really try to understand you, just accept you.
Maybe you are right.. Why fucking bother?
BobDate: Fri, 23 Aug 1996 13:41:55 -0400
hey rebecca, why so glum? The reason we bother trying is because we have a hope that someday we will all be better. Of course we're fucked up, but once we recognize it and try to change it... I don't know.
[snippet of friendly conversation]
byeDate: Fri, 23 Aug 1996 10:02:02 -0500 (CDT)
Subject: Why do we even bother?
Well, we bother to understand or to try to understand each other because that is the primary way in which we form, establish, and maintain meaningful inter-personal relationships. The closer the relationship, the more we strive to understand. I spend little time and little effort trying to figure out the check out woman at Sendiks. However, to keep my marriage the way I want it, I spend many hours in efforts to understand my life partner's verbal and non-verbal communication. If I don't "get it", because the relationship is so important to me, I use the helpful phrase, "Help me understand your thinking on such and such a matter."
When the relationship is such that I just can't understand where the other person is coming from, and when I can't make intelligent predictions, and if I am lucky enough to be just fine without the relationship, I stop trying and say bye bye to the relationship that was or that I wanted it to be. Unfortunately, the greatest stress comes in the work place when sometimes I want to say "bye bye", but I am not allowed to because of a co-worker and inter-dependency status.
So, sorry for the "rant", but your home page latest hit upon a subject near and dear to my heart.
Anyway, I am just like any other reader, right? So I can respond too, right? The difference is that at the end of my response, not only do I say that I enjoy your writing, but I also say I LOVE YOU!!!!Date: Fri, 23 Aug 1996 14:34:28 -0500
Subject: Just wondering...
I was just wondering:
How is stuff going for you?
Here's what I've been up to; not neccessarily in this order:
Working - yay - waiting for a promotion while an idiot who has the job I deserve digs in deeper show his inadequacies.
Taking classes and tests. I am trying to get through the "CNE" track for Novell Netware. I failed my second test just hours ago. I must pay another $85 and retake it next Friday.
Planning for a vacation I cannot afford. My friend Mark and I will be going to the East coast a week from today. We start in Newark (actually Wayne, NJ), drive to Manassas for the DAVE MATTHEWS BAND concert, then to Richmond, VA to enjoy the heat. We are hoping to spend most of our 9-day tour in Virginia Beach. Mark wants to go to the US Open and a Yankees game while near New York. I think I have aboutr $200 to spare. I'll let you know how it turns out.
Finally practicing safe sex. You'd think Dawn and I would be smart enough not to play with fire. God gave me a 2 minute warning this week, and I'm happy to report I am still Single, with no kids.
But again, how's stuff for you?
Duane<sl'lee> rebecca-- communication is an elusive thing. the more you
<sl'lee> focus on it, the more difficult it can become to get a handle
<rebeca> it must be email!
<sl'lee> i'd liken it to the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy lesson on
<sl'lee> flying-- throw yourself at the ground and miss
<rebeca> ok i can put that up too
<rebeca> i like metaphors
Dear All of the Above,
What are you talking about?
Well, actually, in all seriousness, the middle part of yesterday's ReadMe did specifically state the following:
I struggle for hours trying to figure out what someone meant after they have said something. If it is on line, I log the conversation and reread it. If it is oral or face to face, I scribble notes in my diary and reread that.
So, yes, I do try.
It is more than an addiction; it is a compulsion.
Sometimes it does work, and by working it can lead to even more confusing questions, such as the one I posed two days ago, that no one answered.
Have a great day,
THE README INDEX
or, if you must, back to Rebecca's Revenge
Copyright 1996 Rebecca Eisenberg firstname.lastname@example.org. All rights Reserved.