READ ME ... yeah, right. Right?

I'm sick of everyone else having on-line diaries. I want one too.

What is this all about? Maybe you should read the READ ME READ ME.

january 16, 1996: unexpected solace

for some strange reason, today was a very good day. i can't really explain it, nothing that good happened; nothing i wanted to develop developed; nothing i wanted to go away went away.

it was good, in an unexplainable-it's-good-so-don't-question-it good way.

maybe it is because i am really thrilled that, in approximately 40 hours from the time of typing (3 am tuesday morning, if you are curious) i will be in san francisco, hanging out with my fabulous friend kristin diamond, whom i haven't seen in about a year.

kristin is probably the only person in the world, other than yale weiner, who is no longer with us, who has the amazing abililty to put things in perspective. i often need to have things put in perspective. she has an uncanny amount of common sense, and a real flair for knowing what to do and what to say, without coming off as that type of person who knows that she has a real flair for knowing what to do and what to say.

she held my hand the entire summer i studied for the bar, held my kleenexes when i cried for a whole week when my cat edward jumped out of my third story alamo square apartment window, and completely understood why i had to call her in the middle of the night when john and i broke up. i owe a lot to her.

maybe it was because melrose place was really good tonite. maybe it is because i am now watching the banal aol chat room conversation being displayed on my television set during mtv's "singled out;" maybe it was because people were actually nice to me during the geek radio show tonite, and everyone agreed that powermac 7500's are truly wonderful machines and that apple does a nice job on repairing broken computers.

maybe it is because i was shown two cool easter eggs from a guy who works in the quicktime division of apple.

maybe it was because i received more fan mail than hate mail today.

(see, i do read your letters).

maybe it was because anyone who had once started reading read me has since stopped, so i can begin to be more brutally honest here and less fixated on criticizing people whom i have no standing to criticize. maybe it was because i looked again at cate corcoran's home page and that of her friend kate, and was inspired. maybe it was because i had some fun today toying with boys on chat channels, one of my favorite activities.

i'm not sure.

i was told that i need to make this text bigger. i love it when constructive criticism is more constructive than it is criticism.

so, no bitter, angst-ridden commentary today. i feel happy that i have a couple friends; i feel content that i will find some job and some apartment, and not necesarily the perfect job and the perfect apartment, and i feel hopeful that things can only get better. how very pollyanna.

perhaps i am misguided, out of touch, and completely stupid to be happy. well, it is a nice change.

tomorrow, i will probably be bitter again.

but maybe not.





or, if you must, back to Rebecca's Revenge

Copyright 1996 Rebecca Eisenberg